Harry's a star, Muggle Style
by Amber Akasha
Summary: Harry might be famous in the Wizarding World, but it's going to be on his own terms.


Harry's a star, muggle style.

I seriously have no idea where this came from. I have to start sleeping more for than a couple hours a night...my brain's getting weird. .

* * *

Harry was a slut.

He knew that, and to be honest, the thought didn't bother him all that much anymore.

He liked sex, no big deal. There were worse things to be addicted to.

He knew the Wizarding World wouldn't understand; heroes were not supposed to do something as human as having sex. They were supposed to either end up alone, just like the cowboys of old, or if he had to have a companion, it better be the perfect good little wife, the perfect white-picket fence surrounding the legion of sons and daughters and the little modest house that was expected of them.

Morons.

He was a hero, a freaking star in the limelight, that he could accept. It didn't mean he liked it, but he accepted it. But being the model little puppet for this world to use and vilify and discard and then use again? No way.

The wizarding world was in for a surprise. Harry had long decided that if he was to be a star then he'd do it right.

Muggle style.

Oh boy, he couldn't wait to shock the pants off the Wizarding World.

Harry had been, let's say, _preparing_ for his debut as a star for a while now. He had secretly watched muggle artists, both through the TV he had bribed the Dursleys into buying for him and through gossip magazines he got from a well-placed friend in the neighborhood.

He had had enough studying; he had always been partial to the hands-on approach anyway. He had managed to get the Dursleys to cover for him -money, unlike magic, could do anything and everything, it seemed- and had disguised himself as a groupie, following rock bands all around the globe. He had shamelessly used his cloak to spy on unsuspecting actors and actresses, and had quietly stalked famous writers and movie directors. He had made of Hollywood his home for a while, and after he had squeezed all the life off the stars' particular Mecca he had moved onto fashion designers. Apprenticing under one -his only responsibilities coffee-bringing and food-providing- he had learnt all the secrets of the trade. Not the designer sphere -he wasn't really interested in that- but he had gotten the hang of being a star and, more importantly, a _diva_.

He was ready now to shock the Wizarding World, but first, he needed three things: a manager, an underling, and a fan club. While he guessed the last one wouldn't be that hard to get -he was planning on contacting the Creveey brothers, and things would roll from there- the other two would be harder to find.

He needed someone sarcastic, with a strong personality and quite a bit of power for the managing position. Had they not been bitter enemies, Snape would have been his first choice, but he didn't think money alone would suffice to fix that one. Sirius would have been perfect for the job -and eccentric enough to become a star himself- but he was supposed to be on the run, so that one was out too –he needed someone who could be his public face. Malfoy Senior would do nicely, what with his disdainful attitude, but he was on the other side...though he guessed he could try to change that. Voldemort was going down, _that_ anyone could see, and Malfoy didn't look like someone who'd follow such a horrendous thing into defeat.

It was worth a thought.

For the underling position he didn't know who to ask. Hermione, with her timetabling skills would have been perfect, but he didn't think she'd react well to being bossed around. Ginny was out, there was no way he was giving the leech any hopes. Ron? Come on, be serious; Ron was going to be difficult enough to manage once he came out as a star, he needn't add more stress to the situation. Perhaps Percy? He was doing a nice enough job of being the Minister's underling, after all...and he sure liked the glint of gold.

Well, he still had two months until school started, plenty of time to cross t's and dot i's. And once he was ready...He'd turn the Wizarding World on its head.

* * *

And... that's it. Seriously don't know where this came from. *Scratches head* So, hum... review? Pretty please?


End file.
